Pivot Points and Asymtotes

When I left school on Thursday, March 12, 2020, I had no idea it would be the last normal day. While I sensed an extended spring break was coming, I thought I’d have Friday to wrap things up and collect my missing library books.

I awoke on Friday the 13^th to the news that our school system had abruptly announced an immediate closing, but the seriousness of the situation still hadn’t hit me. The coronavirus seemed surreal and somehow far away. We’re not in China. We’re not in Italy. We haven’t been on an International Cruise. I spent the afternoon biking with friends to a brewery to take advantage of the unseasonably warm and unexpected day off. It wasn’t until I went to the grocery store later that day and saw the aisles of empty shelves that it began to sink in. As I looked over random items that were left, I felt a pit in my stomach. We’re not going to starve, I thought, adding split pea soup and rosemary flavored couscous to the cart.

Even then, the scope of the pandemic was unfathomable to me. We’ll lay low for a few weeks to flatten the curve, I thought. And a few weeks turned into a few months, which turned into a year.

During writing workshop, I talk with my students about hinge events or pivot points. These times when life takes you in a new direction often make great writing topics. Some of these might be planned joys—a marriage, a new job, the birth of a child. Others might be unexpected challenges—a divorce, an illness, an accident.

Or a worldwide pandemic.

This week marks one year since The World Health Organization (WHO) declared the novel coronavirus outbreak to be a global pandemic. Over the last few days, the news and media has been full of stories and reflections to mark the anniversary of the pandemic. While you may enjoy reading these perspectives, I’d like to encourage you to write your own.

Now, I know I’m not your teacher and it’s been a while since you’ve had an assignment. I get it. Maybe you’re not a writer. Or you don’t think you have time. But hear me out. You don’t need to show this to anyone—it’s just for you. Take a few minutes and jot some things down. No one’s checking your grammar and you don’t even need to write in complete sentences. What do you remember about the beginning of the pandemic? What sticks out about the past year? What’s changed for you? How are you feeling now? 

Why? Because the way you feel about something now isn’t the way you are always going to feel about it. Processing evolves and changes over time. Especially when the story is still unfolding, because this pandemic isn’t over yet, is it?

We talk about seeing the light at the end of the tunnel as if the end will arrive in an instant—one moment it’s dark and confined and then —BAM— we’re squinting in the wide-open sunlight. While the beginning of the pandemic was a pivot point, the ending is more gradual, almost imperceptible at times, like a sunrise. And we’re starting to understand that we will never completely return to the old normal, much like an asymptote is a line that a curve will approach but never reach. Instead, we are evolving towards a new normal.

The pandemic forced us to pause, take a look at routines and traditions, and figure out how to do things differently. I hope many of these innovative solutions continue even after the threat of coronavirus subsides. For example, I love that I can meet with my doctor for a virtual chat and go to staff meetings in my pajama bottoms. I love “streeteries,” the street closures that allow expanded outdoor seating for restaurants.

As I reflect on the past year, my biggest challenges were common—missing family and friends. Disappointment over cancelled events. Figuring out how to work virtually. Learning how to teach effectively during the pandemic was incredibly challenging. Imagine being a dentist and you need to perform oral surgery with a blindfold and one arm tied behind your back. You don’t feel properly equipped and your patient is complaining that you’ve missed their mouth entirely and have just tried to extract a tooth from their eyebrow. Thankfully, I’m not a dentist, and my students are resilient. All things considered, I was pretty lucky last year. No one in my family got sick or died. I have a job and health insurance. I even used my time pretty wisely. Heck, I published a book!

One year later, I am fully vaccinated with one of three vaccines currently available. I’m back in school full time. I’m starting to adjust to reentry. I now try to color coordinate my mask choices with my cute outfits for school AND I miss wearing pajama bottoms. I love seeing people again AND I miss my alone time to read and write more. Our summer plans are still unknown. No one else in my family is vaccinated yet, and the cruise to Alaska I had hoped to take for my 50^th birthday celebration has been postponed. So, my story continues.

And so does yours. Go. Write it down.

A sign of the times: our 2020 Christmas card